#3. Jeff finds Sir Alex's raffle ticket...

Q: At the PFA Player of the Year awards, you see Alex Ferguson drop his raffle ticket and then pick it up without telling him. Later that evening the ticket wins the top prize of an all expenses paid fortnight in Mustique. Do you own up or pack your suitcase?

Jeff: "I am sorry but I will not be around for the next two weeks to do this column. You are never going to believe it, I gatecrashed the PFA dinner this year and guess what, I only went and won the first of a fortnight's expenses-paid holiday in Mustique. I bumped into sir Alex whilst I was there, he called me a jammy bastard, or I think he said that, I couldn't really understand him. Anyway, b******s to him, I'm off to Mustique. Best thing is I didn't even buy the ticket!"

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Posted by: Lex